Autistic self scripting gone wrong

I haven't been evaluated for autism, but I have severe anxiety and I often find myself in situations like this (even though I'm medicated now). Like, I go over what I think will happen in my head and prepare myself to say the right words and do the right things, but it's hard to get back on track when something unexpected happens. Recently I tried to use app coupons at a convenience store by typing in my phone number at the register, but the coupons didn't apply correctly and I was so taken off guard that I was like "uuuuuuuuuhh uuuuhh uhhhh" and fumbling with my words. The cashier could not understand that I wanted to cancel the purchase at first because I wasn't prepared to communicate that and it was so embarrassing because there were customers waiting in line behind me. I asked my brother to drive me to a completely different convenient store so I could try again lol

The one reason why doordash is so good for us😊❤❤❤

Its worst when they small talk and you cant leave 😅

It took me about a 100 times of practice, I still mess it up, but I'm motivated by niche coffee shops more than I let my train wreck of social skills stop me 😅

Lol as soon as she started rehearsing I was like "Oh no here it comes..."

Just wait till you've been doing it for a few decades and you're like "Yeah... What could possibly go wrong..."

Exhausting isn't it🙇‍♀️

I hate when people make you have to interact or speak MORE than it was already expected, especially if I'm overwhelmed or anxious already. The perfect recipe for disaster

Today I was waiting to pick up my order thinking over and over “they will call (my name) and I will say thank you” she called my INITIALS and asked if I wanted butter. Was too stunned to thank 😢

I write entire screenplays for hypothetical situations in my head. Never realized it was a 'tism thing...

Mobile ordering has changed my life. And lightened my wallet as it allows me to get coffee out more often. But also now i will only get coffee at the one place that i have an app for.

I used to be this bad. I still don't go through drive throughs if I'm driving. That's another thing, didn't get my license til I was 29. Now I can drive, but not in big cities without a ton of stress, and not for long periods of time. 😅

It was way harder on the other side for me. Being a customer is easier because I’ve been practicing it since I was a teenager. But working retail was awful. I had to mentally rehearse what to say for every type of transaction, and if the customer changed their mind or tried to small talk, it threw me off so bad.

damn u'r cute XDD

This is why I tend to go to chain stores. They typically have a script that they follow and I can plan what to say around their script. 🫂

Never wearing cute clothes again!!

A random girl cashier complimented my dress last year when I paid for my lunch. I just said, "Thank you, have a nice day!" And then i walked over to my table a few meters away.

So cute, I can imagine how difficult it is….. But anyway most people don’t follow any script anymore- in good and other ways

lmaooooo my mom saying “they never follow the script!!” is ringing in my ears 😂😂😂 i wonder where i got it from (jk it was both of them)

Crap yes! 👀 Megan does so well the "deer in the headlights" that it really looks rude from an allistic pov, because it looks like contempt, a sort of "just WHAT did you say to me?? How dare you! Pfff I swear!", which is enhanced by the dry "no I'd like to order" and confirmed by the surprise and confusion of the allistic cashier, which is well expressed by her confused "euuh okay?" . It's just the way she passed the order, by rolling out the script so weirdly "out of place" and in an hesitant voice that showed her stress and "deer in the headlights" position. That's why the cashier got nice and empathic from that point, to make the confused Megan at ease, and kinda forgot that she didn't didn't answer "well" before (not that it got out of memory, just that it doesn't matter anymore).

Now I'm writing this, I'm amazed at how well Morgan acted both herself and the cashier.

Really funny that I learnt allistic thinking to the point I can understand AND explain it sometimes better than themselves lol. It is visibly the case of Megan too. That's why I can "see" how a situation is perceived for both, as long as I watch from outside and can read body language too, but when it's for interactions I have myself it's harder, since I hardly can do it while I act my part of the interaction.

"But wait I do this all the time and I'm not autist- ohhhh"

This is why I order in apps

This is why the other person's remarks can't matter in your plan. You go in, don't make eye contact, and just say the thing you planned no matter what they say first. Do the three things you planned, in order, and maybe at the end you get your coffee.

Am I autistic cuz this happens to me all the time and I almost got a freaking anxiety attack watching this 😭😭😭

I’ve learned if u start the convo first then u can control the script and how it goes!

you have no idea how often I've left without paying (and had to go back) 😭 literally did last week

I literally have to do this before every new interaction

Skim milk could be part of your problem kiddo. The brain needs fats. Try heavy cream instead

That is not one of my dialogue options erRROR

I know this all too well. I hate it when they try and be nice.

This is so funny, because I did the same thing as a cashier for the pizza place I used to work at. Any time a customer called, I had a script I had invented to walk them through the ordering process, so that I wouldn't get overwhelmed and confused. I cannot stress enough that no one was making me do this. Eventually I had the regulars so well-trained that they had it memorized, lol XD

Yeah, if I don’t have scripted sentences then I kind of stutter as I search for words to make coherent sentences! And then I feel embarrassed, which makes me feel even more withdrawn when I’m trying to interact with others!

I’m 40 now but I remember doing this a lot when I was in my 20’s

The cashier don’t want to make eye contact these days.

I feel that! Not to that extent, but I always forget what I'm getting and forget what things are called when it's my turn.

"That's not the script." I'm dead 💀 🤣

I didn't even know there was a term for this!

I follow a script all the time at work but it doesn't include "how are you today" because not everyone says it, so I get caught off guard when people say it to me and then I just answer and quickly get back on script and as a result I'm slightly rude because I never ask people how they're doing 🙃

This is a thousand times worse when it's in your second or third language. You prepare for the script and they don't do it and then they ask you a question with vocabulary you're not completely familiar with, so you try desperately to answer and maybe make a joke, but when they laugh they say something else you don't completely understand, so you melt into a puddle and resolve to never enter that shop again.

I used to work at Starbucks and they implemented this requirement where you have to compliment one thing about each customer or ask them how their day is going and get them to share something with you, if you are on register, and this is the exact reason I gave to them as why this was a terrible policy. While it was very positive with extroverted people and people with very high amounts of narcissistic traits, it absolutely threw off all the neurodivergent and introverts, and also all the angry old people we regularly got in who just wanted coffee and resented us for merely existing. :D

and that’s why i order online lol

And all this is just fun compared to when person have stuttering.

Don't worry. As you get older your script will evolve into a dialog tree.

For me I mentally catalogued a bell curve. Most interactions have a script but there are edited versions.

On either end of the bell curve is where things get tricky. Either they are being rude and then I say nothing and that is socially acceptable (until someone asks why don’t you stand up for yourself) or they won’t stop talking so I say nothing anyway aside from a few “neat,” “nice” or “ah” every now and then.

shoot, as an adhd-er, going off script with customers is my absolute favorite thing. now I feel like a jerk

I love her eyes

Great, as an extrovert this video has made me terrified that my conversationalism scares people on the spectrum when my intention with it is to make people feel welcome 😭

This is why I love ordering through the app and then picking up my stuff. Because it just becomes a skipable cutscene.

Pretty much...😂

I also hate new places because I'm instantly disoriented and can't even make a script before going without knowing everything about place. One time walked in a cafe, saw just a bunch of bottles of alcohol behind the cashier and got confused thinking maybe it's a bar and there's no food. So in English with my ugly accent (was traveling) I asked cashier three times "WHERE'S FOOD, I WANT FOOD"...... Yeah I wanna cry just thinking about it and I def will never go back to that place even tho it was nice

Yeah, people don't tend to follow exact scripts, BUT. . .
If you play the video game Monkey Island then you'll understand that one insult has many comebacks and if you know all the possible comebacks to all the possible insults then you can always win each verbal battle. Keep learning because your brain will put it all together one day. Take it from an older autistic person.