My CRAZY Depersonalization Fears - And How I Got Over Them

I am afraid of getting amnesia, forgetting who I am. Please tell me how to deal with it.

I had a full blown panic attack bc I was with friends and my bf one night and a friend said « we had a crazy week damn » and I tried to remember my week and especially the day before and I couldn’t so I started to think « what if I have DID ?? » so I asked my bf « what did we do yesterday ? » and he looked at me and said « um idk I don’t remember » (like a normal fucking human being lmao) and I started freaking out bc my anxiety told me « ok your bf doesn’t exist, he is in your head so he can’t remember yesterday too » and I told my anxiety « no ! He exists our friends see him! » and my anxiety respond « they might not exist either ! » and I started to panick, next thing I knew, I was sleeping in the psychward for a night lmao

i can completely understand these dissociative symptoms as in the beginning i had them too, when i used to walk my brain asked why you walked? When i talked my brain again said why you talked? My brain also thought that this body doesn't belong to me, and the most weirdest thought that keeps coming in was "why the hell i can't see myself" except in mirror.and then same thing i felt like i am behind my eyes, seeing was not same as before, i knew somewhere that it is the same world like before but never seemed one. I felt as if my eyes were like a camera,some gaming app's front screen. Through which i can see so many things, i saw every detail at home at roads,and keep thinking like how the hell i can see so much??? But wait!! I always see things like that before too its same so why its kind of weird to me now? Finally It took me one year to understand that it's a kind of thought that keeps coming in i have to just let it go, if it is there then its ok let it be,just ignore and do your normal work. Whole year took me to understand that it was all in mind nothing was real. I know it is scary at the beginning. But as time passes it will heal. I am sure my buddy have faith in you. You will definitely overcome it. Be in touch. If you feel like talking. Loads of love and peace your ways. Stay strong i know you will overcome that

Thank you 💌

I have all fears that you mentioned in this video + fear of losing control over my own actions and killing somebody or myself. That's scary

Dude!!! same feelings!!!

Swammy,is it normal to like get weird about day night ; derealizing what night is what fay is

Hey Swamy
I have the symptoms of dpdr from few months but the symptoms now changed now the dream like is reduced but the places are looking wierd.
I went to pyschaitriast i tell him that i feel detached then he asks me questions like do u hear noise , that somebody is calling u . Do u see faces etc we'll i don't hear or see things that he said till i gone to him but after going to the pychatrist i developed a fear what if i developed those symptoms and the fear is so intense that sometimes i hear that somebody called me when i surrounded by people s or i hearing some thing I'm in state of fear crying in my bed.
Please help that these are my only perception or something else

Why do I feel like life’s a video that will end and that nothing is really happening, nobody is living. Like, imagine theres nothing inside everything. Times not real, so is the universe. I cant trust people, or things.

Just thanks

I have 100 % recovered now I even smoke weed again

Thanks a lot!

Swamy i feel weird looking at my wife..n all people
..how long time u have all this?

I relapse after 5 years of being recovered from dpdr. I am feeling somewhat better, but I still have a lot of thoughts that are bothering me. Unfortunately lately I can’t stop thinking about death, because it’s inevitable and terrifying to me. I’ve always been afraid of it, but I can’t stop thinking about it to this degree. I just wish I could stop fearing it so much.

Swaami sir i have no blurr vission and no existensiol fears but from past 2 months i feel detached from everything .im just 17 and im not able to understand what i should do plsssss help mee that how can i recover i ve watched many videos but i dont understand im sooo depressed😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢

A: My deepest fear is waking up from a coma and seeing I have a whole different life, different family and friends ect.

But “so what?” :)

the hearing my own thoughts one has been huge for me, thank you for this video cleared most of my fear of it and knowing im not alone

i fear not i will not love my family as before

i feel disconnected from my past memories, as they have happened in other world, but i know it is my same life

Hey Swamy thanks for your videos :) They help a lot. So I wanted to ask if someone else has had this: apart from the feelings of dp dr and irrational fears such as 'life doesn't feel real, im in another dimension, what if i stop existing...' I also have a super big fear of not being able to connect with my memories and being scared of time. Like, I question myself constantly what the meaning of 'future', 'past' and 'present' mean and I feel like I am trapped in the present. In an irreal present. I mean, I can remember everything and I can talk about the future but everytime I think about what I'm going to do or a memory comes to my mind, I feel scared cause I can't understand the meaning and nature of time. What if time stops suddenly? Also, it actually doesn't exist cause we made it up... idk I am aware of how crazy this can sound but it scares the shit ut of me. Is this an existential thought? Thanks :)

I know this sounds funny, but is it normal if you have DP/DR to watch this and feel like you aren’t real even though I know you are?

When I look at my parents I feels like why are they like this in a Human form, why am I like human. I am just freaking out due to this feeling. 😭

Thank you so much you really helped me a lot🙏😭

Due to the current state of anxiety and derealization, I instilled in myself such a worldview based on existential thoughts that all human activity in life is built on the secretion of certain hormones (or brain biochemistry, the essence is the same), so more and more I do not see the point in human relationships, in art, study, career, travel, yes and throughout life, because all this in the context of such thoughts is fake, ephemeral.
Because of this, I experience a terrible depression, and it seems that I will never be able to be as happy as before. That this stupid "philosophy of nihilism" will become entrenched in my personality, and either I have to somehow morally come to terms with it, or I simply cannot do it, driving myself into an even stronger depression, and as a result - suicide.
I already can hardly believe that these existential thoughts can let you go along with the anxiety and derealization, as other popularizers of the topic claim. This brings terrible moral torment. Still, other people in this state, it seems to me, at least hold on to something in their life, but I fell into such a pit, from which I see less and less a way out, and after all, only 3 months have passed since everything started. I feel wild guilt from all this, because if it were not for the smoked "joint", then I would be a happy person. Now I think that on the basis of such a destructive worldview for me and the whole condition in general, my life is ruined, because in the past I did not adhere to such a way of thinking, and it seems that this will be fixed in my new, not so good personality. Did we have something? What should I do in this case?
And also, a often think about existencial thoughts like: "What is the meaning of the art of creativity? What does this activity give people?" You know, many people advise to be distracted by movies, TV shows, music, and so on, in order to shift your focus from monitoring your condition. But because of such thoughts, it is extremely difficult to do it.
And, in principle, I no longer seem to understand how human society works. It seems that I am superfluous in it, but at the same time I think philosophically in the context that "everything is clear to me, and there is nothing else to do in this world." This is terrible.

Hey Sammy , i had dp/dpr 2 months ago and it went a way for like a week and then it came back with all these fears of going crazy and i sometimes feel like the walls are moving and everything is moving and it gets really scary. Will i get over this?

I’ve been suffering from it since I’m 5 because of childhood traumas but nothing can help me as I’m obsessed with existential thoughts and while I have no answers for these questions I think like I’m crazy and nothing is real

Hey Swamy and anybody else active on this feed. Did anybody else struggle with any of the following (trying to determine if what I have would be considered DP) - deep thoughts about the brain (Am I just a brain? If so, does it control me or do I control it?), struggles with Somatic OCD (weird feelings like a disconnect between my brain and body, how am I walking? how am I taking deep breaths? how, how, how?), complete loss of self (Am I a brain with a body? A body with a brain? Where am I? What am I?).. I know it's a lot, but Swamy's videos have given me a ton of insight, just wondering if any others have experienced this weird existentialism?

Thank u swami g

Swarmy, do u think anxiety is the reason of DP DR?

Notice how you brush aside your fear of solipsism by making up an emotion that seemed others are separate from you and feeling which is what you were doing before the fear began. Its a cope

I have this scary thought of ever existing or dissappearing into nothingness how can i overcome this?

Did you have thoughts that what if depersonalisation isn’t even real either

What if this video isn’t real an what if everything else isn’t real

Oh wow. I remember when I thought I was an alien

Thanks for sharing your fears and thoughts. I felt today especially that I am here and aware of everything around me but it's not real. It causes panic. Because somewhere I know it's real and I'm real and I have a history. It feels disconnected. I am afraid that I will succumb to these thoughts and believe them as true.

Thank you so much ❤

Did you or any one else with DPDR get any VISUAL symptoms???? Like floaters, or flashes of light???

do anyone felt strange about his thoughts or how the thought come from or going be crazy, or how I talk and think and always، And he always turns his actions and thoughts and wants to escape from them because they disrupt his life. Am I alone or someone like me?

#4. Omg that's what I trip about!

To be honest i wish to forget everything in the past when dpdr happened. I regret so much mistakes i have done and i just want my life back. These thoughts and feelings are like slowly consuming me or should i say fear is. But question. If dpdr is gone and anxiety does it mean these symptoms are gone. If so when im fully recovered and I remember these things can it put me back to dpdr?

Remember being in the shower and thinking "I'm going to wake up in bed any minute now" and it just haunted me, haunted me so badly the feeling of "I'll wake up soon". Then there is the feeling of "switching dimentions" like I feel as if the same people and world are around me but I'm in a different dimension, everything feels off and I'm the only one who can tell, it's like a whole new me and whole new dimension but everything is the same I just know it's "off" and it's not my "home dimension"

Hey Swamy. So I stopped experiencing derealization and that out of body experience. Existential thoughts are gone.
My problem is that I still don't feel like I'm me.. My personality, the person who I used to be. It's gone. Sometimes I feel like I'm going crazy. I still can't stay alone with my thoughts. I just can't get myself back like I forgot who I really am.. Will this also disappear?

this was extremely helpful and I thank you for brining my mind at peace even if its for a time.

This video saved my life. The comfort of knowing that other people I’ve dealt with this, too, is amazing. If you are reading this, you’re not alone.

i think i have fully recovered i felt like i was living in a dream and then couple weeks it went away i think but im scared if i wake up il have these feelings again but i just have lack of motivation

My main fear rn is that I’m repeating lives because some evil demon god entity is punishing me 😭

My issue is the severe calmness and feeling of being in another dimension when I am calm. People falling in live etc, I cant feel a thing because I'm in this feeling of too much comfort I start to over think stuff.

I permanently tend to conduct self talks, which makes me afraid. It feels like I am speaking to another person although that person is still me. I know that this is the case (just me) but it feels strange and triggers fear

I cant bear my thoughts they are like an imagination i obsess over them being like this but i learned rhat a noisy mind isnt helpful lol most people want a quiet mind.

Hey @Swamy G - thanks for making this video ♥