Tommy Boy - Fancy Guarantee

"Why do they put it on the box?"

"Cause they know all they sold you was a garuntee piece shit"

A guy puts a fancy guarantee on a box because he wants u to feel all warm and toasty inside. Makes a man feels good. U figure if u put that guarantee box under your pillow the guarantee fairy 🧚🏼‍♂️ might come by and leave a quarter. Am I right ted?

What's your point?

My point is how do u know the fairy 🧚🏼‍♀️ isn't a crazy 😜 glue sniffer? Building model airplanes ✈️ it says! " I'm not buying it!" He sneaks in your house 🏡 once and that's all it takes next thing u know there's money missing off your dresser and your daughter is knocked up. I've seen it a thousand times.

Why do they put a guarantee on the box 📦 then?

Because they know all they sold u was a guaranteed piece of shit. Look 👀 if u want me to take a dump in a box and put a guarantee on the box I will, I have the spare time. So for your daughters sake, your customers sake, u might want to think about buying a quality product from me!

Well that... WHAT??? Haha

They just don't make movies with this kind of comedy anymore it seems. RIP Chris Farley!

That's how you make a sale.

The reason why Tommy was able to talk Ted into a sale was because Ted already liked the Callahan business and their products from the past, as he said at the start of this clip before mentioning that the brake pads though were no good without the garuntee on the box (Tommy's dad must've always remembered the garuntee when doing business with them in the past). But, Tommy was basically able to convince Ted that the great business and products that Callahan's always given them had nothing to do with the garuntee on the box, and that even a box with shit inside it can have a garuntee on its box. I've seen this movie a thousand times

Not only was it hilarious, his sales pitch was genius and makes perfect sense.

God I miss this man. He left this world way too soon. Thank you for the memories Chris. And thank you for some of the best movies ever made. You'll always be in the hearts of all your fans. R.I.P.

Hey you can get a good luck at your butcher...What?

This movie holds a special place in my heart, personally any comedy movie from the 90's. Now today comedies don't hold a candle to brilliant work like this.

lol.. How all things are made and advertised this way now. Shiny and fancy with those hypnotizing trigger words and phrases to show you what a deal you think ur getting. Now they force you at gunpoint just to buy the protection plan b/c even THEY know they're ALL built to break within 2 years. All these expensive smart devices, useless random electronics, shit HP Printers that up charge you 99% on ink toner, and Black Friday TV deals.... All purposely built to break or malfunction to where at least something on it won't be working like it's suppose to be. Apple even admitted to decreasing their devices performance after it's battery runs a certain number of cycles. Hence forcing you to pay to replace orrrrr Protection Plan! GUARANTEED PIECED OF SHIT

Now that the quote, "Well that... WHAT???", as well as all the others, that have been repeated a thousand times... they are now BROKEN.
We ALL saw the movie a thousand times, and know every line. PLEASE... Can some of you come up with something ORIGINAL?
Thank you.

Ok I'll buy from you.....whaaaat?😂

It was so awesome to see Tommy putting it all together here in this scene. This movie is gold.

Now this is the art of the deal!!!!!

Because all they want you to know is that they sold you a gareenteed peice of shit. 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣. The dude has the right idea for selling stuff

Chris was a great actor. He shows it here. So sad he is not with us anymore. Rest in Peace, Chris Farley. We still miss you.

“Build model airplanes”

Griffin from hotel transylvania , Shrek (orignally only) and Maximus I. Q from atomic betty in tommy boy

Next thing you know there's money missing off the dresser and your daughter's knocked up. LOL

“Hey, if you want me to take a dump in a box and mark it guaranteed I will, I’ve got spare time.”

I wonder how his daughter's doing? Probably wealthy since her pops went with Callahan, a quality product.

One of the funniest scenes of all time!

This movie and The Wolf of Wall Street both have good sales techniques that we can all learn from, even tho some lessons are comedic and teach us how to rip people off lol

Rip farley

Course it does. Why shouldn’t it?

This pitch makes me happy

Love the sales pitch

AND THAT FOLKS IS HOW YOU MAKE A SALE. (THOMAS CALLAHAN JR)

“Because they know all they sold you is a guaranteed piece of shit!”

LOVE THAT LINE

he was a straight shooter who knows how to talk sh*t like his old man, thats how you sell.

i know this was published a long time ago but i kept thinking about this part of the movie when linus from linus tech tips said to trust him on his quality over have a written guarantee for his products. and then got mad at the community when they all wanted a written policy

.......

Ok!I'll buy from you

Chicken wings…. Lol

"honey look at this human bomb on the news?"

"Huh? Oh yeah I buy brake pads off him. I thought we were watching cartoons?"

"Chicken wings..." 💡💡

"Well, that's -- What?!"

The timing and comedic pacing of this movie is so perfect. Lmao.

Next thing ya know there's money missing from the dresser and your daughters knocked up!

I still miss the bug guy!!!!
RIP

If u want me 2 take a dump in a box and mark it guaranteed,I will..I got spare time. 😆 🤣 😂

One of Farley's best moments on camera

Ayye if you want me to take a dump in a box and mark it guaranteed,, I will.. -Tommy

"Cuz they know all they sold you is a guaranteed piece of shit."

The timing and delivery was pure genius! I would've bought those break pads lol

"Hey, if you want me to take a dump in a box and mark it guaranteed, I will. I got spare time."

On the matter of degrees: “Hey if you want me to take a dump in a box and mark it guaranteed, I will. I’ve got spare time.”
-Tommy Boy

Has aged well